LUSL Barts vs LSE (H) - 08/02/2024
Woah are we on the second match already, feels like we only played the other day, oh wait.
With no time to waste on mourning, we set our eyes on a new target. LSE. With Leech setting out the aim to ‘have fun’ we all knew what we have to do. After all winning is fun, and Leech is a sore loser.
The game began, blink and you’ll miss it. Lumpfish? The ball? Flaccid Brexit? Goal? And we were back lining up in the middle. Tadpole Josie put some pace on her player, giving her a tutorial of how to play waterpolo. Helsinki closely copying, giving her player what can only be described as one of Heli’s tough workouts, @helis.sportsstuff. Leech was leeching about. Gosh my brain is frazzled, someone get me another jäger bomb and the Nordic spirit. Flaccid was flacciding, scoring yet again. Lumpy was lumping leading to a man down, silly lumpy. But Milfy miracle flow was milfing, protecting every inch of the goal. Leading to ZERO goals being conceded this quarter. MASSIVE. 3-0 to Bart’s.
The second quarter…. Forever channeling the words of Shakira whenever, wherever. Lumpy showed his hips don’t lie, leading to a massive 5 goals this quarter. Balint following suit, scored another screamer. Dirty Chubs hips definitely didn’t lie either, when she showed her player how to Waka Waka hey hey, she can’t playayyyyy, outfield. Forcing her player to rethink her choices and play in goal. Tadpole Josh’s player felt blinded speechless by his performance in pit. 11-2 to Bart’s.
The third quarter saw much of the same. Speed, goals, and some tears from LSE after their second timeout to regroup. After Leech boiled the kettle, put her feet up, drank her cup of tea, LSE were ready to continue. Ceviche fed some beautiful plays into the arc. Tadpole Kev was busy getting spicy with her player, I’m not sure where hands were going… Lumpy found the back of the net, so did Flaccid, then Lumpy did again, and again so did flaccid. Woahhhhh LUSL Barts have some sympathy, your supposed to be medics (and dentists) get ready for your OSCEs. 15-7 to Bart’s.
After a quick refresh on the rules of waterpolo, we set out to close out the game. Bal unleashed into attack, scored a fantastic hat trick this quarter. Molly Horris didn’t go easy on her player, forcing her to keep up. Helsinki gracefully won us a pen, and then pounded it past their goalie with thy might. Miracle flow was channeling her might, fighting off any ball that flew her way! Flaccid played another two beautiful back to back goal, finally giving us a cheeky smile. After a final drowning for Leech the match was over. Victory! And we had fun ;) 21-11 to Bart’s.
Player of the match - Heli for winning and taking a fantastic pen.
Goals scored:
Christian - 9
Liam - 7
Balint - 4
Heli - 1
